RJMarmol.com

I Always Thought That I'd See You Again

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Just hours ago, I had an epiphany. Beautiful. Quiet. Fulfilling. Dreamy.

If I could bottle it up and show it to you, I would have done it, just to prove to you how wonderful it is. But there’s no bottling abstract feelings of the heart or ecstasy of the soul. There’s no describing it. It is beyond words. Even beyond images. It’s something that can only be understood by another heart — one that beats in time with yours, one that’s so sensitive and in tune with the slightest of your emotions.

They have an overrated term for it. Love.

But I won’t call it that. I won’t call it by any name. And that’s because lately, after 29 years of earthly existence, I had a stunning realization — calling “it” love reduces it to mere fad — like a hyped phenomenon. Like a programmed response to an act of kindness. There may be truth in it, but who can really tell? And sometimes, the more you focus on the term, the more you dwell on it, the more that it loses its meaning. There has got to be a better term out there for it. But no, it’s not love. It’s something far better, something far greater.

I write this post for a wonderful person, whose mere existence is a blessing in itself. I write this for that person who never left, come hell or high water. I write this for you, my dear Ritchie. I write this to let you and the entire world know that I will be forever remorseful of the wrong I have done you. I wish I could have spared you from the pain. And I wish I could rewrite the story, skip the bad and make it all better.

Yes, I’ve seen fire and I’ve seen rain. And I’ve seen sunny days that I thought would never end. I’ve seen lonely times when I could not find a friend. But I always thought that I’d see you again. And I did. And I still do.

Click here to listen to “Fire and Rain” by James Taylor

Here’s to nine years of friendship, four years of marriage and one adorable son. Few things in this world astound me. And of that few, nothing comes close to my amazement of your incredible display of commitment. Whatever happens, come hell or high water, I know that I will always see you again.

● About Me
Cecilia Regina Aquino Blanquera Marmol aka RJ Marmol profile picture

I’m RJ Marmol — writer, musician, and independent creator based in Manila.

I write songs, essays, and books about the messy overlap between money, overwhelm, creativity, identity, and rebuilding. Much of my work circles around what happens when life stops feeling manageable — and how we try to think clearly, make decisions, and keep moving anyway.

I’m also the author of Rebuilding Under Debt: Thinking Clearly When Everything Is a Blur, a nonfiction book published under Steady Hand Press. The paperback edition is listed under my full publishing name, Cecilia Regina Aquino Blanquera.

On the music side, I release work as HeyRJ. On the writing side, this site is where I gather my books, essays, notes, and whatever I’m building next.

Music

HeyRJ is my sonic soul project. I create raw, minimalist-style and deeply personal music interpretations that feel like a late-night conversation with your truest self.

By blending lo-fi acoustic textures with poetic honesty, my work explores love, loss, grief, healing, and the quiet in-betweens of life. Each song is a letter — a journal entry — a gentle companion for when the world feels too loud or too quiet.

While my catalogue began with intimate cover renditions, my work is increasingly being shaped by original writing, drawing from years of poems, lived questions, and emotional survival.

“Stuck Home Syndrome” released on March 20, 2026 is my first original 20-track album written during a period when time felt compressed and days began to blur into each other. The songs came from sitting with thoughts that had nowhere else to go — unfiltered, repetitive, and sometimes uncomfortable. It’s a concept album that isn’t built around singles or polish. It’s closer to a continuous inner monologue, recorded with minimal production and very little ornamentation and meant to be listened to as one cohesive body of work. The goal wasn’t to resolve anything, only to document how it felt while it was happening.

On May 29, 2026 I released new original singles – “Rapturous”, “Uh Huh”, “Look At You”, “All That” and “Blew Print”. I continue to release both original and cover songs and intend to so for as long as I can so check back every once in a while — you might. just find something you’ll like.

For business inquiries relating to music, email me at: heyrjmusic[at]gmail[dot]com or my personal email at: rjmarmol[at]gmail[dot]com.

Books

Rebuilding Under Debt: Thinking Clearly When Everything Is a Blur

A nonfiction book about what debt does to the mind — and how to begin functioning again when financial stress has made everything feel blurred, urgent, and overwhelming.

Rather than treating debt only as a financial math problem, the book explores the emotional and cognitive realities of financial distress: shame, decision fatigue, avoidance, panic, relationship strain, and the difficulty of making sound decisions while mentally depleted.

Published under Steady Hand Press. It’s available worldwide in ebook and paperback formats on Amazon. Bookstores and libraries can also be order it wholesale via Ingram.

Contact

For book-related inquiries, media requests, bookstore questions, or discussion-group invitations, you can reach me through the contact page on this site or send me an email to rjmarmol[at]gmail[dot]com or hello[at]steadyhandpress.com

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