RJMarmol.com

The Art of Waiting

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The Art of Waiting

by: rj

 

I sit and wait, sit and wait for nothing

In my heart I dream, well there has to be something

I sit and wait, sit and wait for the coming

Of a someone who keeps on hiding and running.

He is here somewhere, I feel it and I know

Possibly nearer but he just wouldn’t show

When I’m afar he asks me to come closer, you know

And when I finally say yes, he starts running with nowhere to go

Why do I put up with all this game?

When all I got from it is nothing but shame?

Things I used to treasure like power, glory and fame

I see them all now, going down in this dying flame.

Why do I always believe? Am I that naive?

I know I’m powerful and strong-willed, but to him I concede

There is nothing I withhold, anything I will give

Just for a cup of coffee, to all his demands I will yield.

Shall I wait some more? The clock says it’s four

Shall I pack like a whore

And make plans to even the score?

I can all but wonder why I wait and bother

For an ounce of shower of warm affections from a lover

Because of what I have in my heart, the world entire I forgot

See my soul being shattered, beaten and crushed in the softest spot

Unrequited love seem to burn to ashes after being mercilessly torn apart

The dream is no more, it is lost, and I feel someday it will inevitably rot

I sit and wait, I sit and write

Of a love that will never come

One that might not have existed,

One that has never been, that has never begun

I wish the utter frustration just vanishes and perishes

Burn all the wishes, the dreams and the promises

But I know it’s useless, in your eyes I’m defenseless

There’s no stopping, no going back from these perilous stretches

There isn’t a mountain worth climbing, rolling from or trekking

Or an ocean worth swimming, drowning in, and sinking

There isn’t a verse too lofty for writing

Even when all inspiration is lost, and I’m down to nothing

I sit and wait like a house without a gate

Please come in, don’t knock, just enter in haste

Go straight to my heart,  patiently waiting traceless of hate

Revive this ailing love that’s keeps dying each time that you’re late.

Let me know what you think… :)

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● About Me
Cecilia Regina Aquino Blanquera Marmol aka RJ Marmol profile picture

I’m RJ Marmol — writer, musician, and independent creator based in Manila.

I write songs, essays, and books about the messy overlap between money, overwhelm, creativity, identity, and rebuilding. Much of my work circles around what happens when life stops feeling manageable — and how we try to think clearly, make decisions, and keep moving anyway.

I’m also the author of Rebuilding Under Debt: Thinking Clearly When Everything Is a Blur, a nonfiction book published under Steady Hand Press. The paperback edition is listed under my full publishing name, Cecilia Regina Aquino Blanquera.

On the music side, I release work as HeyRJ. On the writing side, this site is where I gather my books, essays, notes, and whatever I’m building next.

Music

HeyRJ is my sonic soul project. I create raw, minimalist-style and deeply personal music interpretations that feel like a late-night conversation with your truest self.

By blending lo-fi acoustic textures with poetic honesty, my work explores love, loss, grief, healing, and the quiet in-betweens of life. Each song is a letter — a journal entry — a gentle companion for when the world feels too loud or too quiet.

While my catalogue began with intimate cover renditions, my work is increasingly being shaped by original writing, drawing from years of poems, lived questions, and emotional survival.

“Stuck Home Syndrome” released on March 20, 2026 is my first original 20-track album written during a period when time felt compressed and days began to blur into each other. The songs came from sitting with thoughts that had nowhere else to go — unfiltered, repetitive, and sometimes uncomfortable. It’s a concept album that isn’t built around singles or polish. It’s closer to a continuous inner monologue, recorded with minimal production and very little ornamentation and meant to be listened to as one cohesive body of work. The goal wasn’t to resolve anything, only to document how it felt while it was happening.

On May 29, 2026 I released new original singles – “Rapturous”, “Uh Huh”, “Look At You”, “All That” and “Blew Print”. I continue to release both original and cover songs and intend to so for as long as I can so check back every once in a while — you might. just find something you’ll like.

For business inquiries relating to music, email me at: heyrjmusic[at]gmail[dot]com or my personal email at: rjmarmol[at]gmail[dot]com.

Books

Rebuilding Under Debt: Thinking Clearly When Everything Is a Blur

A nonfiction book about what debt does to the mind — and how to begin functioning again when financial stress has made everything feel blurred, urgent, and overwhelming.

Rather than treating debt only as a financial math problem, the book explores the emotional and cognitive realities of financial distress: shame, decision fatigue, avoidance, panic, relationship strain, and the difficulty of making sound decisions while mentally depleted.

Published under Steady Hand Press. It’s available worldwide in ebook and paperback formats on Amazon. Bookstores and libraries can also be order it wholesale via Ingram.

Contact

For book-related inquiries, media requests, bookstore questions, or discussion-group invitations, you can reach me through the contact page on this site or send me an email to rjmarmol[at]gmail[dot]com or hello[at]steadyhandpress.com

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